An Opportunity to Pray

Heard from our agency today. It seems that the new case reviewer for Geovany's case was pregnant and has had a miscarriage. She is out of the office on rest and nothing further will be done on our case until she returns. While I'm frustrated about yet another delay, my heart breaks for this woman who has lost her child. I know many of you have been praying for us and for Geovany. Today, would you take a moment to pray for this woman? I know nothing about her, not even her name, but God knows. He sees her where she is. May He provide comfort for her grieving heart and peace in the midst of this trial.

Blessings,

Challenging Questions

"When through Jesus Christ we are rightly related to God, we learn to watch and wait, and wait wonderingly. I wonder how God will answer this prayer. I wonder how God will answer the prayer the Holy Spirit is praying in me. I wonder what glory God will bring to Himself out of the strange perplexities I am in. I wonder what new turn His providence will take in manifesting Himself in my ways."

I read through these questions from my devotional book several times this morning and am still pondering them as I type this. Spoke with our attorney yesterday. He went to the MP on Monday, having missed the appointment Friday because he was sick. They told him to come back this Friday. He also said, that because someone was concerned that there was a possibility of bribery or corruption leading to the potential positive release of our case, our case has been reassigned to a new MP official. So, we're kind of back to where we were this time last year. What's old is new again! So, I wonder what glory God will bring to Himself out of this strange new perplexity. I wonder what new turn His providence will take in this.

"God always keeps the minds of His children open with wonder, with open-eyed expectancy for Him to come in where He likes. I wonder how many of us have been getting our ideas and convictions and notions twisted. Thank God for the confusion if it is going to drive us straight to the watchtower with God,...watching, waiting, wondering and witnessing."

Today, I am taking my worries and concerns straight to the tower. I'm going to sit and watch and wait with expectancy that God is going to come, in His time, when He's ready. When He does, I want to see it! I don't want to miss it. I want to see Him coming across the landscape, marching forward, deliverance in hand. I want to be staggered with wonder at the amazing way God works this out.

Blessings,

Struggles

My head knew that there was a good chance last Friday would come and go and we would hear nothing. But my heart refused to accept it. I cried more Friday afternoon than I have in a long time. It's safe to guess that since we didn't hear anything, either the meeting didn't take place or there was nothing good to report.

I'm beginning to really wonder where this road goes. We can't just spend the rest of forever waiting. We need to continue to find purpose in each day. We want these days and months and years to count for something. To make a difference in His Kingdom. The question is "What next?" and how to you move forward when there is something so uncertain that holds your heart?

I still believe that we were called to start this journey. God clearly directed us to Geovany. He is still God. But He also created us with a free will. An ability to choose and those choices affect not just us, but so many others. There are many people in Guatemala who don't want these remaining cases to finish. Will they win? I don't know the answer to that question, but tonight, it looks like their choices are affecting my family. My son sits in an orphanage, because someone else is choosing to exercise the free will they've been given. I'm not angry, but I am sad and my heart aches.

Samantha needed extra snuggles Friday night. She wanted Mommy to lay next to her in bed while she fell asleep. As I did so, I wondered, does anyone take the time to lay next to Geovany when he's feeling scared or unsure? And the tears fall and there are no clear answers. But still there is hope, because of Who God is. Maybe one day, Geovany will know what it's like to be part of a family. To matter so much to someone that they're willing to set aside their plans and just snuggle or read a book or look at a rainbow together. But, more than this, I'm praying, that should he never know the love of a father here on earth, he will know the love of his Heavenly Father for eternity.

Being challenged as I read a book by Oswald Chambers on prayer. On waiting and watching, waiting expectantly with the faith and anticipation of a child. Watching, not giving up, not growing weary or lazy, watching from the post I've been given for God's hand to move. How much easier it would be to give up. To walk down from the tower and say "God is done." To close the door and never look back. But God hasn't called us to a life of ease, a life that requires nothing but playing. In His darkest hour, Christ asked His closest friends to do one thing...watch with me. And they slept. May God not find me sleeping in this dark hour, but watching.

Blessings,

Friday

Another email today confirming that our attorney will be meeting with the public ministry (who was supposed to release our case two weeks ago) this coming Friday. I want to hope for the best, but we've been here so many times, only to face more disappointment. In my devotional reading this morning, this quote jumped off the pages...

"Faith is unbreakable confidence in the personality of God, not in His power. We must have confidence in God over and above everything He may do, and stand in confidence that His character is unsullied." -- Oswald Chambers.

I've been mulling over that all day. I know it's true. My faith is in HIM, not in what He does or does not do. How thankful I am for little pieces of truth that God slips into my day.

We appreciate your prayers for those involved in this meeting, that God's will would be done.

Blessings,